Ecclesiastes 3:11 (ESV) He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.
You hear all the time how time flies. It seems like the minutes go faster the older we get. And yet some days seem to drag. I'm not really sure why that is the case but lately the moments seem to become seconds and fly through space without anything to slow them down. That is good and bad. Good in that I'm ready to move to the next phase - to be married to the man I love and move and get settled into a new normal. Bad in that my kids are just weeks away from graduation and being far more independent than I think I'm ready for.
Every day seems to gain speed in some ways and slow down in others. It's funny time - what is it really. I really don't think we have a clue. It's just a marker that we live by to try to anticipate the future. Realistically speaking I believe the reason our time and God's time never seem the same is because we really have no concept of time. We can't comprehend what God does and so He gave us this way to track our days to give us some sense of security.
When I look back at how it always seemed like time dragged and realize how many things and people I don't remember I realize that time is relative to the moment we are in. The years all seem to merge together into a blur of mismatched memories that really I can't keep straight. I envy people who can mark time and memories and tell you exactly what happened on a certain day or month or year. I don't really understand how that works because for me there are moments that really stand out and then there are long stretches that just run together. Dates are not my thing. It's not that I don't have very specific memories but they are more centered around what happen than when.
I was just thinking today and trying to put a time on something and realized it had been much longer than I thought. It happens so quickly that I look back and realize time has passed. They say time heals all wounds and I guess that is true because for me at least the bad things don't seem to pop up and I really have to think to nail down dates. For me that's good except for the number of people that I honestly don't remember. I can sometimes see the faces in my mind but I can't find the names or even remember the events. It's sad and make me feel like a really bad friend or person. I am trying harder these days to be more intentional and just hold on to people but it's hard.
In my heart all the people are a part of me and I know they have impacted my life - they helped me through times when I was lost or alone and even though I don't remember every name and every face I am who I am because of those who touched even a small part of me.
Thank you. Thank you all for each touch - those remembered and forgotten. Thank you.
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