Romans 12:2 ESV Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Recently I had to give myself an attitude adjustment. Sometimes I let this world influence my thoughts and actions and I have to seriously adjust what is going on inside my head. This verse is how I adjusted my mental status. I had to capture the negative thoughts and replace them with something that is beyond this world and all of its chaos.
For some reason I have always struggled with the holiday seasons. It's not that I don't love holidays and celebrations but for some reason it always seems to amplify my ongoing struggle with feeling a part. A part of the groups that I am associated with and even a part of my family. Even when I'm with the people that I love I still feel somehow separate and on the outside looking in.
This year was no different and I found myself getting angry and jealous of those around me. It was busy this year for Christmas and maybe the rush of a wedding and anticipating new babies and the missing of those who were lost this year or just not present made it seem more intensely lonely than the last few years. I'm really not sure what the difference was and maybe it was just a little anxiety and depression that was affecting my mental status.
What I found was that I sometimes get caught up in the doing the things that I do, reading my bible, working, spending time with family and I forget to just listen and feel. You see there is only one thing that I can depend on to be there and to always just remind me of what is important and that is my God. I took a walk, and I asked Him to adjust my attitude. He reminded me that part of what I struggle with is the reality that this world is not my home. My heart longs for His presence and when I forget to keep my eyes on eternity and let the distractions of this world and the longings for more here on this earth get me discontent then I get angry and jealous. I want what others have, or I think that this world will somehow fill that void and that is not how it works.
When you know Jesus as Savior and your heart seeks to fill that hole that only He fills with other things then your heart gets lost a bit. My heart got a little lost this year and I had to recenter myself on Him. He calms my anxious and jealous thoughts. He transforms my heart to have a better attitude about this world. To remember that my one job here is to better reflect Him so others will want to find Him and love Him so that they can live for eternity in His presence. I'm not here to be perfect or to have all the things that this world offers. I'm just here for Him to do His work and to be a living sacrifice for Him.
Romans 12:1 ESV I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.
I pray that if you feel anxious, afraid, jealous, angry, or just plain lost that you will take the time to seek the one who created you and loves you just as you are. I pray you will find your identity in Him and cling to the promises that are in His word. He has great plans for you.
