Just One Day

This past week has been full of questions. Details about this day. My wedding day. I've fielded each one with some guidelines but a somewhat nonchalant attitude. Why?  Because it's just one day. 

As I woke up this morning to the sound of thunder knowing the wedding is outside I was reminded again that this is just one day. I wanted to arrive at this day with little to no expectations because I didn't want to be caught up in worry and stress or disappointment. I simply want today to be the beginning. 

The beginning of a lifetime. And not all moments will be sunshine and roses. Some will be rain clouds and thunder. I don't want to live my life based on other people's expectations or my expectations because that will always lead to disappointments. 

Today I marry the man of my dreams. Whether we start our life together on a hillside covered with sunshine or in a barn with friends and family doesn't matter. Because it's just one day that marks the start of what's more important. 

Our marriage will be marked with many days. Some good and some bad but each one a piece of a lifetime. How we deal with the bad will help shape the good. Last night I watched my kids laugh and dance in the rain and there was lots of laughter. That's what I always hope to have. Laughter in the rain. 

So if it rains on this one day that I get married it's all okay. Because just as God takes the broken pieces of our lives and weaves them into a beautiful tapestry of grace so He will take one rainy wedding day and weave it into a lifetime of love and joy. 

“But the righteous shall be glad; they shall exult before God; they shall be jubilant with joy!” Psalms 68:3 ESV

All For Good

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 ESV

I believe marriage should be forever. It should be two people striving to help each other be the best they can be. I believe God ordained marriage as an example of the covenant He wants with us as His children. 

The reality is no matter how much we want to believe this should be forever and be happily ever after and all the fairy tale things, we are imperfect broken people. That means we sometimes face struggles and sometimes the relationship we thought was so right just doesn't work out. For whatever reason sometimes marriages end. Because we are human we alone can't just make something work just because we want it to. 

We choose however, how we allow that ending to affect us and those we have relationships with. We choose whether it's just a transition or a huge negative that makes us bitter, ugly people. 

I say with my whole heart that I have no regrets about my first marriage. Out of it I learned so much about myself and how I function in relationships. I learned that marriage is hard and you have to work every day to make it work. I gained some amazing things through my marriage. 

A friend for life. 

Two beautiful kids of my own and one amazing one from him. 

A whole additional family that I love dearly. 

Amazing insight into myself. 

I can't say that the ending was easy but as time has passed I can honestly say my first marriage was a blessing and I wouldn't change a thing. My prayer now is that my second marriage would be built on the foundations learned from the first one. I know God has to be in the center of the relationship. 

I grew up in church where divorce was looked on as the worst possible thing. And I'm not saying that it is a good thing but because we are human we are going to have struggles and sometimes things end. I think as believers what we need to learn is that regardless of whether we divorce or remarry or stay single we just have to remember that God is enough. We have to stop judging one another because we handle our struggles differently.  If we chose to love and accept each other maybe we would be in a better place. 

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” Romans 8:18 ESV

So as I move to the next step I know God is making all things good. He takes all our struggles and works them for His good if we let Him. Just a few more days and I will start the next step of His plan. My prayer is that I will allow every previous struggle to lead me to the place closer to His heart so God can continue to reveal Himself and make me more like Him.